
The Way Through Depression
Depression is not a mental disease. It is a dysfunctional mind condition in which an individual strives desperately to avoid the unhappy and the undesirable experienced in life. The antidote to depression is not an antidepressant drug, which is not the way to cure depression. TAO is the Way -- the way "through" depression by experiencing everything, thereby instrumental in helping the depressed individual accept and embrace all in order to fully understand why the mind dysfunctions.
Sunday, February 5, 2023
Why Prayers Are Seldom Answered?

Saturday, February 4, 2023
Spiritual Wellness for Better Mental Health
Stephen Lau
Friday, February 3, 2023
Understanding What Freedom Is
Your freedom is about your right, your choice, and your obedience.
But your right
does not necessarily become your choice, and your choice may also involve
your obedience to act accordingly. Remember, you are living your
life, and nobody can live it for you. So, what is someone’s right does not
have to be your choice, and your choice may be subjective to your
obedience to others. Freedom is complicated and paradoxical, but it does play a
pivotal role in every aspect of your daily life and living.
The bottom line: To
have a better understanding of what is “true freedom”, you need wisdom to open
your mind.
WISDOM
Opening your thinking mind is your wisdom, which is not the same as your knowledge. Knowledge refers to the information you have acquired, while opening your mind means using the information collected to apply to your everyday life and living. So, an individual can be knowledgeable but without being wise.
Then, what is wisdom?
And where does it come from?
Wisdom is all about opening
your thinking mind to find out how it perceives and processes not
only all your life experiences but also all the information you have been
exposed to through your individual five senses. Your perceptions and processes
create the so-called “realities” in your own mind, and they subsequently affect
how your mind thinks, giving you your beliefs, your attitudes, and even your
self-delusions.
The reality is that you
have both a conscious mind and a subconscious mind. All your past
information is stored in your subconscious mind, which controls and dominates
your conscious mind. In other words,
your wisdom is your mental capability to separate the truths from the
half-truths, as well as to discern and discover the self-delusions and the
self-illusions stored in your subconscious mind. Without that mental
capability, you will not fully understand your “freedom”, as well as your
choice and obedience to do this and not to do that.
“The reason why man may become the
master of his own destiny is because he has the power to influence his own
subconscious mind.” Napoleon Hill
So, your wisdom is all about controlling your subconscious mind.
Thinking is also a process of self-intuition through asking relevant questions to create self-awareness and self-introspection. It is the natural habit of your thinking mind to solve problems by asking specific questions. Solving problems with specific questions is self-empowering your thinking mind to attain wisdom because it creates your intent to learn, to discover, and then to change for the better.
Knowing the importance
of asking questions and the continuation of asking more relevant questions is
the way to attaining true human wisdom.
For example, to develop
your empty mindset, do your reverse thinking—which is thinking backward
by asking questions to find out how and why you might have
your current thoughts of thinking with your attitudes and prejudices, as well
as with your beliefs and emotions. Your reverse thinking may then show you that
your so-called “new realities” are, in fact, distorted and even unreal.
FREEDOM with BONDAGE shows you how you can have "freedom" and not "bondage" in your everyday choices and decisions.
Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
Thursday, February 2, 2023
Cancer Cure
This book is all about . . . .
This book is about what to do when one is diagnosed with cancer. The author is neither a doctor nor an oncologist. He is simply showing the power of the mind not only in coping with the traumatic experience of cancer but also in overcoming the disease itself. In addition, he presents detailed information on what an individual must do on the cancer journey of cure and recovery.
A cancer diagnosis is not a death sentence. Rather, it is an opportunity for growth and development. Harness your mind power to conquer your cancer.
CONGRATULATIONS! YOU'VE GOT CANCER!
What is Cancer?
Cancer is a multidimensional disease. The word “cancer” is a term used for diseases in which abnormal cells divide without control and are able to invade other tissues. It is a consequence of the failure of your repairing and defense mechanisms in your body. Cancer cells can spread to other parts of the body through the blood and lymph systems. Cancer is one of the most dreaded diseases of humanity.
This is a common scenario. You feel a lump or a swelling under your arm and see your doctor about it; or you may have some health issues, requiring some tests. The doctor tells you that you have a tumor, which is a swollen collection of cells. Is the tumor benign or malignant? For confirmation, a biopsy is usually performed.
A benign tumor means it is slow growing, it does not easily spread to other parts of the body, and therefore unlikely to be fatal. If the tumor is malignant, it is growing rapidly, and is likely to spread to other parts of the body, and therefore life-threatening. If the cancer shows good response to whatever treatment the patient chooses, it is said to be in a remission. The chance of the cancer returning is often greatest in the first two years. In the next three years, the chance is considerably reduced. After five years, the patient is said to be cancer free. Probably as old as life itself, cancer has been around humanity for ages, but only in the second half of the 20th century did the number of cancer cases begin to explode exponentially. The sudden surge of this devastating disease was probably due to:
The drastic changes of high-stress lifestyle
The overuse and misuse of drugs and pharmaceuticals
The inferior quality and the huge quantity of junk food available
The excessive use of chemicals and extensive exposure to environmental pollutants
All of the above were not around a hundred years ago, or at least not as rampant as they are now,
Contrary to popular belief, cancer is not a mysterious disease against which you are powerless. If you understand its causes and take positive actions, and if your body still has enough time to make the necessary adjustments, you can still win your battle against cancer and become a cancer survivor.
Cancer appears to be a mysterious disease because it is a disease caused by not one but many factors. Unfortunately, the conventional approach to the disease is to treat the malignancy of the tumor. Cancer is holistic dysfunction of the body, the mind, and the spirit; as such, there should be a holistic approach to the disease.
Although you may not be a doctor or an oncologist, learn everything you need to know about your cancer. You need neither a medical background nor medical expertise to know the basics of cancer. Your goal is not just to survive your cancer, but to thrive and turn your health around.
You have to understand that in many ways you are responsible for the disease. Get a handle on why you may have made yourself prone to that disease in the first place. In life, everything happens with a reason, though it may not be too apparent to you at first. Once you understand the reason, you may be able to control, if not get rid of, the disease completely.
Be A Cancer Survivor
Although cancer is a complex disease, it is critical that you empower your mind to know as much as you can in order to initiate the healing process.It is estimated that only approximately 15 to 20 percent with chronic or catastrophic illness, such as cancer, can be called cancer survivors.
The attributes of a cancer survivor
A cancer survivor is an individual who is willing to take the responsibility for his or her health conditions, who makes an effort to reshape his or her life, and who actively participates in his or her recovery process.
Do you wish to become a cancer survivor, or are you content to become one of the 50 to 60 percent of cancer patients who just sit back and let their health professionals take control of their prognosis?
Even worst, are you like one of the 20 percent cancer patients, who have a death
wish because they have found themselves in a death trap?
If you become more knowledgeable of cancer, you make better health decisions, and you have a greater chance of survival.
Be a cancer survivor. The choice is all yours.
The Importance of Emotional Well-Being
An important aspect of your cancer therapy and recovery is your emotion, which
is controlled by your mind.
One of the most essential aspects of the mind is self-acceptance. As a matter of fact, self-rejection is the root cause of all emotional problems, such as mental depression. In life, you are who you are, and you must accept yourself as who you are, not someone you wish you were or could be. Likewise, you must accept the hard reality that you have cancer, and you must deal with your disease accordingly. Many cancer patients harbor thoughts of denial, or, worse, self-guilt. Therefore, if you are unhappy, angry, blaming yourself, the world, or even God, you are self-generating and perpetuating your own misery, which is destructive both emotionally and physically.
A Trauma, Not A Trap
To be diagnosed with cancer is already a traumatic experience, to have to undergo various therapies and treatments only further aggravates that excruciating experience. Therefore, it is critically important that you do not let your traumatic experience overwhelm you and turn it into an emotional trap.
What is an emotional trap? How does it differ from an emotional trauma?
Wednesday, February 1, 2023
Why You Have Your "Freedom" Not to Choose "Fondling"
What is fondling? It is your desire to do repeatedly something that you are fond of to the extent that your mind just cannot stop your action. In other words, your fondling is your addiction and bondage.
DRINKING
Alcohol drinking is common among teenagers; about 40 percent of high school teens drink alcohol due to social acceptance of drinking and the belief that alcohol can lower anxiety.
Alcohol is an intoxicating ingredient produced by the fermentation of yeast, sugars, and
starches found in drinks. Beer has 5 percent of alcohol; wine, made of
grapes, has 12 percent of alcohol; liquor, such as gin, vodka, and whiskey, has
about 40 percent of alcohol.
But alcohol has its many dangerous side
effects. It slows down the brain functions, leading to slurred speech, lack of
coordination between the body and the mind, unconsciousness, and temporary loss
of memory. In addition to brain and nerve damage, there are many health issues
of the heart and the liver related to alcohol drinking.
Social drinking may lead to binge drinking, which is drinking several times within 2 hours. Drinking only beer may progress to drinking wine or even liquor. The truth is that no amount of alcohol is safe or risk-free, and alcohol drinking is a progressive disorder that often leads to alcohol addiction and drug abuse over the long haul.
Freedom
As a teenager, you have the freedom to choose or not to choose social drinking as a platform for your interactions with others.
Not choosing it gives you the freedom to
use other platforms for your communication with others, such as actively involved through traditional sports,
afterschool clubs, and social excursions. Social media may or may not be an
ideal alternative.
If you choose to start drinking beer, you
must have the freedom to say “no” and not be pressured by others to start
drinking wine or liquor.
Bondage
Alcohol addiction will put you in the bondage of alcohol withdrawal symptoms—anxious, confused, depressed, fatigued, and shaking while not drinking alcohol.
Another bondage of alcohol addiction is
the shackle of drug abuse. Alcohol is very reactive with many drugs and
medications in that it can magnify or negate the medicinal effects on an
individual with alcohol addiction while taking those medications. So, drugs can
be abusive and destructive to an alcohol addict.
The way to turn bondage into freedom is to
stop consuming alcohol. It is never easy without medical and professional help.
But you have the freedom to free yourself from that bondage.
Smoking cigarette must be avoided because it contains nicotine, which damages the brain, leading to many health issues of the brain, the heart, and the liver later in life. Your brain, which continues to grow and develop up to around age 25, can be damaged by nicotine. The damage initially affects your learning with lack of attention and mood swings. Nicotine withdrawal—stopping smoking with symptoms of anxiety, depression, insomnia, irritability, and physical fatigue—often puts you back to smoking.
Nicotine is an addictive drug that
initially gives you excitement to “free” you from boredom and anxiety. Many
teenagers begin smoking cigarette out of curiosity, as well as having observed
many celebrities smoking on screen in old movies or even their family
members.
Now, it is not even “cool” to do
e-cigarette or vaping with its appealing flavors because they also contain
nicotine
Freedom
You have the freedom of choice to smoke or not to smoke.
If you are already a smoker, you still
have the freedom to quit smoking or continue to smoke.
But your freedom to smoke will inevitably
put you in bondage.
Bondage
Your bondage to all the physical, emotional, and mental damages of smoking may be lifelong.
The only way to turn the bondage into
freedom is to quit smoking. That requires physical, mental, and spiritual
efforts and perseverance.
CALMING
In your transition phase, many addictions, other than drinking and smoking, may crop up as your mind continues to grow and expand.
Addictions are distractions from focusing
on other more important things in life. These distractions can temporarily calm
you down, but they do not solve your problems. Addictions to calming yourself
can come in many different forms, including some of the following:
Eating: Foods give pleasures to the tongue. Over-indulgence in eating leads to obesity and other eating disorders.
Gambling: Winning satisfies the mental craving for success and self-confidence. Compulsive gambling is the source of many financial problems later in life.
Games: Video games can create “gaming disorder” with social anxiety, lack of motivation in life, and interpersonal conflicts in everyday life.
Networking: Internet obsession may lead you astray by directing to many platforms of misinformation and wrongdoings.
Freedom
You have the freedom to eat, to play video games, to go online, and to do just about anything in your daily life.
But you have only 24 hours a day, just
like everybody else. So, you must learn how to manage your time and not giving
yourself time stress. Good time management involves setting precedence
and priority over anything and everything you need to do.
Living is about doing—doing what
needs to be done, but not over-doing, which may, paradoxically, lead to
non-doing.
In your transition phase from adolescent to young adult, your knowledge
is essential to your doing. However, you must also understand the fact that
knowledge is infinite, and your capability to acquire your knowledge is
only limited. Your true wisdom is to apply your “limited” knowledge to see how
it works in your everyday life and living—that is, knowing what to do and doing
what you know.
So, spending too much time on anything
is not the way to go.
Bondage
Not knowing that “excess leads to depletion” is your vulnerability to bondage.
To free yourself from being trapped to any bondage, remember the golden mean: “more for less” and “less for more.”
FREEDOM with BONDAGE shows you how to free yourself from your bondage to the flesh that gives you the "freedom" to make the wrong choices and decisions in your everyday life.
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
Tuesday, January 31, 2023
The TAO in Everything
The TAO has thrived and survived thousands of years for a good reason: what was applicable in the past is still applicable in the present; what was true in the past is still true today. Another testament to this universal truth is that "Tao Te Ching"-- the only book written by Lao Tzu -- is one of the most translated books in world literature -- probably only after the Bible.
The TAO is easy to understand but most controversial. The explanation is that there is no absolute truth about human wisdom, which is all about self-intuition and self-enlightenment. That is to say, your mind is uniquely yours, and your thinking is your own thinking.
Monday, January 30, 2023
No Freedom Only Bondage
Human freedom of choice is often held hostage by its bondage to the flesh, where your corrupted body dwells and the origin of the desires and wants of your thinking mind that ultimately change the freedom of your choice.
No matter
how soft or strong your bondage may be, one bondage always leads to another.
The more bondages you have, the greater their control on the freedom of your
choices and decisions, and the more wrong things you will subsequently do.
An illustration of one bondage leading to another and yet another
On July 4, 2022, a 25-year-old Black man in Akron, Ohio, was shot 60 times by 8 policemen. The news was widely reported in the media because the victim was a Black man and the police had presumably used “excess force” to gun him down.
The victim, who had no criminal record,
was initially stopped at a routine traffic stop.
Maybe “racial injustice” and “excessive
use of force by police” told the victim’s mind that he had the “freedom” to get
away. So, he chose to get away. His “freedom” tied him to the “bondage”
of “getting away.”
Driving away his car and being chased by
the police put him in another mental situation that gave him the “freedom” to
choose to fire his gun to “stop the police chase.” His freedom of choice only
reinforced his bondage to “getting away.”
After stopping his car at some point, the
bondage of “getting away” told his thinking mind that he had the freedom to
“flee on foot” and so he did.
While running, his bondage told his
thinking mind that he had the freedom to turn around to do whatever he chose
and decided to do. But he was shot dead.
The above tragedy could have been avoided
if the victim had not taken his “freedom” to “get away” in the first
place, which led to his bondage that distorted his thinking mind with another
freedom of wrong decision leading to another and yet another bondage that
finally tied him to his own death.
The "freedom" of choice of actions and decisions is controlled and manipulated by the human mind which lives in the flesh. Probably, that's what happened in the victim's mind: "I'm a Black, and the police don't like me. The police always use excessive force. I've my freedom to get away as soon as possible."
FREEDOM with BONDAGE shows you how to free yourself from your bondage to the flesh that gives you the "freedom" to make the wrong choices and decisions in your everyday life.
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
Sunday, January 29, 2023
Your Journey of Healing
Why Prayers Are Seldom Answered?
Why Your Prayers Are Seldom Answered? Albert Einstein once said, “Thinking is difficult; that’s why so few people do it.” Think...
