TAO and Adversities
Life is never smooth sailing, and
life journey is always a bumpy ride. Tao wisdom may help you in the art of
living well. Tao wisdom comes from the profound wisdom of Lao Tzu,
the ancient Chinese sage who authored the immortal Chinese classic Tao
Te Ching, which has been extensively translated into many languages
worldwide. Tao wisdom can show you how to heal your pain and sorrow.
For example, after the death of a
dear friend or someone close to you, you may experience a period of denial—refusing
to accept the harsh reality of death. This is the human mind's way of
protecting us from painful emotions associated with grief and sorrow. Tao
wisdom emphasizes the dualism of life: that is, good and bad co-exist just as
happiness and sorrow; and they complement each other. Without sorrow, there
will be no happiness, and one gives way to the other somehow and some time.
Sorrow may bring anger:
anger with yourself or whoever responsible for the death of your loved one. The
human mind always looks for an answer or an explanation of why something
undesirable happened. If you blame yourself, then guilt and regret may ensue;
if you blame others, anger is generated. According to Tao wisdom, anger is the
source of human sufferings. Anger originates from desires and expectations that
are not met or fulfilled.
The next phase is bargaining with
God about reversing what has happened to you. You use "what if?" and
"if only" sort of pleas to bargain for second chances. Tao wisdom
says you should live in the present, and not the past which was gone, nor the
future which is uncertain. According to Tao wisdom, you simply embrace whatever
that comes along in your life without judgment.
After the initial denial, reality
begins to sink in. You start to feel the bereavement that cause you to sink
into deep depression with negative emotions of grief, regret,
and sorrow. This is the darkest or even the longest stage of grief and sorrow.
Spontaneity is of one the essentials of Tao wisdom; it means everything
in life follows a certain natural order, such as the four seasons, or life
becoming death. Understanding the natural order of things may deliver you from
your depression and lift you out of the darkness of sorrow.
The way to overcome pain and
sorrow is acceptance. Sooner or later, you will come to terms with
the death of your loved one when you become aware that everything is going to
be OK, that you will survive the loss of your loved one, and go on living as if
everything is a miracle even though your life may be different without your
loved one.
Tao wisdom is profound human
wisdom that requires you to have an empty mind free from pre-conditioned
thinking. Living in the present enables you to become mindful of your thoughts
so as to have clarity of mind, which is human wisdom. With wisdom, you begin to
see things as they really are and not as what you “think” they may be. More
importantly, it allows you to let go of all your attachments, including your
attachment to your ego, to material things, and to your loved ones. Letting go
lets you see the nature of everything, including pain and sorrow, and even
death.
To find out more about the
profound wisdom of TAO, click here.
Stephen Lau
Copyright© by Stephen Lau
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